Posted 3/28/2003 01:30:00 PM by Douglas

Yet another example of firearms being used to prevent crime without a shot being fired that will no doubt go totally unnoticed by the mainstream media.

Posted 3/28/2003 01:29:00 PM by Douglas

Maybe it's just me, but I have a feeling this event is going to be re-told in a smoky AA meeting some day.

"I knew I'd hit bottom when I got loaded and climbed the bridge tower, shutting down NYC traffic for 4 hours."

Posted 3/28/2003 01:27:00 PM by Douglas

Joe Bob is right on the money, as usual, but this time about embedded reporting going on in Gulf War II.

In other words, it ranks as news somewhere on the level of a high school newspaper censored by a faculty adviser whose name is Miriam.

Ouch. Gotta love that one, and how true.

"We'll turn every reporter into a feature writer," he decided one day, in an inspired vision. We'll treat them, in other words, as morale support personnel. Sort of like the USO. I wonder if any of them can tap-dance.

Probably not, and that's the sad part. All they can do is tell us things we already know.

And of course, Lileks sums it up perfectly:

TV is useful for pictures - I get the feeling sometimes this should be called Operation Stock Footage - and it’s useful for seeing retired military people draw lines on maps. . . .

The details never seem to filter into the TV reports - for all the embeddedness of the reportorial faction, I’ve yet to see a big smashing battle. The more you watch the more you realize how little you’re seeing.

Posted 3/25/2003 05:07:00 PM by Douglas

The first casualty of war is irony. We just heard last week that Russian businesses have been selling GPS jamming devices to Iraq, but no longer. Rumsfeld says today that all of the GPS jamming sites have been destroyed with GPS guided bombs!

Do you think the Iraqis saved their receipts? I'll bet the phones at Moscow's GPS Jammers Я Us have been ringing off the hook.

Do you think they bought the extended warranties because they sure should have. Not only did they not work, but they seem to be non-operational now.

Posted 3/25/2003 04:44:00 PM by Douglas

Dr Evil, call your office. Monkeys trained to detonate mines are only slightly less effective than sharks with freakin' lasers, but it'll do in a pinch.

The most disturbing part of this isn't that Morocco offered the trained monkeys, it's that they had 2,000 trained monkeys available.

And how does that work? Is it pretty much one monkey per mine, or can a monkey "detonate" more than one?

And here is yet another story of jar-head dolphins. Look out, Charlie Tuna. . . .

Was PETA HQ bombed as well? Where are those guys?

Posted 3/24/2003 06:59:00 PM by Douglas

I really think that this is the original home page of the Icy Hot Stuntaz but now they've been taken over by the internet, so we'll never know. I found some pretty damn funny links that claim to be their "real" homepage, and they're funny as shit. Find them here, here, and here.

Posted 3/24/2003 06:30:00 PM by Douglas

If there's one thing I'm sick of hearing about at the water cooler (more than the word "Nuke") is Michael Moore . What an embarrassment. He won an Oscar for his documentary, which, judging from this, shouldn't even be considered for the movie at all. [BTW, I was going to blog this last week, but thought I'd wait for the awards for Moore to make an ass out of himself. Glad He didn't disappoint.]

How pathetic. He won the award, hauled all the nominees up on stage, handed his award to his wife, and started his tirade with both of his fat, judgmental fingers. He probably won't ever get that chance, or that audience, again. But he did, and what did he rant about? The election. OK, Bush stole the election, we get it. You're fat and liberal, we know, we know. Anything new? Where's your gimme cap, I almost didn't recognize you.

And what's with the line as the music started and they drug his fat ass off the stage?

"Anytime you've got the Pope and the Dixie Chicks against you, you're not long for the White House"

What the hell? Apparently the orchestra didn't start playing soon enough because they let this little nugget of info into the annals of Oscar history.

I'm not a particularly big fan of either, but since when did the edicts of United States foreign policy rely on either one of those for guidance? And doesn't it seem like that the Pope and the Dixie Chicks are exactly the type that Moore would generally disagree with? I can imagine that Moore spends many nights tossing and turning in his feculent, crumb covered Star Wars sheets worrying about the actions and opinions of both the Pope and the Dixie Chicks.

Posted 3/24/2003 05:59:00 PM by Douglas

I've been looking for this image for a long time. I'm so glad I finally found it.
this picture:

Posted 3/21/2003 11:32:00 AM by Douglas

If the pilot's good, I mean if he's reeeally sharp, he can barrel that thing in so low, oh it's a sight to see. You wouldn't expect it with a big ol' plane like a '52, but varrrooom! The jet exhaust... frying chickens in the barnyard!

Posted 3/21/2003 09:16:00 AM by Douglas

Finally got to see Frontline's The Long Road to War last night. Boy howdy, that was a frightening program. From the CIA getting Saddam's party in power in 1963 to supplying him with weapons in the 80s, it's all there. Perle, Wolfowitz, Frum. There's your axis of evil.

Posted 3/21/2003 09:07:00 AM by Douglas

As we all saw, naked anti-war protests didn't work, so those wacky kids out in San Fran have to kick it up a notch with a vomit in. Nothing says "hey, we have a well organized, well intentioned protest" like a bunch of people erping on federal employees.

Posted 3/18/2003 08:49:00 AM by Douglas

I just love this picture:

Something about Rumsfeld and Saddam shanking hands back in 1983 is just comical.

Posted 3/18/2003 08:03:00 AM by Douglas

This makes drinking while driving an ambulance look like nothing.

"A nuclear power plant does not fight alcoholism, it propagates alcoholism. Alcoholics are advantageous for nuclear power plants -- they are modest and undemanding, they can work where all norms of sanitary safety are violated, and they can be fired at any time,"

This is sure to be good news to Homer Simpson. He's destined to make employee of the month now.

Posted 3/18/2003 07:19:00 AM by Douglas

Forget about Iraq! When are we going to invade New Mexico? Too bad G'dub is president and not still governor. A swift air strike in Santa Fe would shut this guy up in a hurry.

Posted 3/17/2003 02:34:00 PM by Douglas

If you need an ambulance, you're already in bad shape, but what's worse is when the it gets there and the ambulance driver is loaded. What's even worse is that Donely County is dry, so he probably used the ambulance to go out to Howardwick for some beer.

Posted 3/17/2003 01:45:00 PM by Douglas

Anyway you cut the cards, this is a horrible event. I can't believe there's such a graphic photo montage on yahoo news, but these pictures tell an intersting story.

Here's a picture of Rachel Corey at (where esle?) last year's Burning Man Festival:

And here's a nice picture of her burning an American flag with Palesteian children. Always, think of the children:

And here she is, standing in front of the Iserali army bulldozer:

Here's the first shot after she got run over:

Her friends coming to her aid:

And finally, her bloody, mangeled, lifeless corpse:

I'm sure this event is going to (once again) spark bitter divisions on both sides of this debate, but that doesn't make it any less horrible.