enthalpy

Monday, June 21, 2004


Fidel, in sparse form from his previous eight hour orations, threatens President "Bring 'em On" Bush against invading Cuba. Short end: "That would be very sad."
Tens of thousands of Cubans rallied Monday, as Fidel Castro warned President Bush against launching a military attack on Cuba, saying it would provoke a mass exodus and an all-out ground war.

Washington has repeatedly denied it is planning any military action against Havana.

But an increased tightening of sanctions against the island, along with the Bush administration's pre-emptive strike on Iraq, has convinced the Cuban leadership that a military attack is not impossible.

"Do not try crazy adventures such as surgical strikes or wars of attrition using sophisticated techniques because you could lose control of the situation," Castro said in a speech addressed specifically to Bush before the morning.
When reached for a comment, President Bush said, "Well, we weren't going to invade Cuba, but now we pretty much have to. I've been wanting to kick their ass ever since their big Soviet Brother left their limp-wrist standing at the Western Hemisphere bus stop with a pocket full of lunch money. It's go time, now Fidel. Jenna said she needs a new place to work on her tan, anyhoo."



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