Posted
9/21/2004 08:36:00 PM
by Douglas
When you've got millions of people living in the Houston Metro area, I guess it's just a matter of time before someone pays an ad agency to try to promote it. So, after who knows how much money, this is what those ad wizards came up with:
Houston: It's worth it. Maybe it's just me, but that seems pretty damn dumb. Worth what, exactly? Well, lucky for us, they have a place on the web site where every brain-dead yokel with a mouse and a modem can tell us exactly what Houston is worth. Some of my favourites:
- Because it’s not Dallas.
- In Houston the cockroaches only fly, in New York they pull up in a van.
- You don’t have to scrape hot weather off your windshield or shovel it from your driveway.
- 2 million people can’t be wrong…….can they?
- Because we actually find and produce the energy that Bostonians consume, but only whine about.
- Let’s admit it, fat people are happier people!
- Two words: Lone Star Beer
- You’re never more than a few feet away from a gas station or strip club!
- We have an abundant amount of massage parlors at competitive prices.
- You don’t have to shovel humidity!
- If Houston were a dog, she’d be a mutt with 3 legs, one bad eye, fleas the size of corn nuts, and buck teeth. Despite all that, she’d be the best dog you’ll ever know.
I think that last one would look
excellent on a T-shirt.