Posted 11/26/2005 05:02:00 PM by Douglas

Black Friday is over, and it looks as if Wal-Mart is happy. And if Wal-Mart ain't happy, ain't nobody happy, right?

Wal-Mart Stores Inc.'s deep discounting and expanded hours on the first day of the holiday shopping season, appeared to have paid off, the world's largest retailer said Saturday.

Wal-Mart said it expects to post a solid 4.3 percent gain in same-store sales for November, helped by better-than expected sales during the post-Thanksgiving day shopping rush. That's at the midpoint of its growth forecast of 3 to 5 percent. The sales results cover the four-week period through Friday.

What you may have missed if you slept in yesterday.

Orlando:

An Orlando television station reports that security guards wrestled a man to the ground Friday morning after he cut in line to get a laptop computer that was on sale.

The television station reported that the man argued with other customers and then fought with the guards.

One man told reporters that the laptops were being thrown into the air and people rushed toward them.

Michigan:

A woman was stepped on by several people after she fell when dozens of shoppers rushed into a Grand Rapids area Wal-Mart store around 5 o'clock this morning.

When the rush ended, the woman and a 13-year-old girl suffered minor injuries.

In nearby Grandville, two shoppers were hurt when they slipped on a wet floor as they entered a Wal-Mart. Officials say one of the injured was after a bargain notebook computer. Neither was hurt seriously.

Florida:

A woman at a Pembroke Pines Wal-Mart was also injured and required hospital treatment when she was pushed to the ground by another shopper, according to fire officials.

And of course, Texas:

Early morning shoppers at Beaumont’s Wal-Mart say they were pepper sprayed by an off-duty police officer working security as a large crowd gathered in the electronics department of the store.

“There were some people trying to break thru the crowds because they were throwing up, and couldn't breathe,” said one shopper, Andrenette Davis, “It was pretty bad.”

People, is a crappy $378 HP laptop worth your dignity, or even worse, getting trampled and pepper sprayed? What's the odds of you actually getting one of these computers, anyway?

Calls made to several Wal-Marts around the country revealed that one of the hottest items on the holiday sale list, a $378 Hewlett-Packard laptop, sold out within the first hour the stores were open.

"They trampled each other for 'em," said one Wal-Mart employee at a Maryland store. "It was great."

Someone make a line-up of Maryland Wal-Mart employees so this fucker can be shot. Immediately. But to continue. . .

Four Wal-Marts contacted by CNNMoney.com said they received limited supplies of the HP laptop, ranging from 15 at a store in Michigan to about 65 at the Maryland location.

Fifteen computers. The flagship loss-leader of the whole sale, and there's 15 of them? Why the hell do people continue to spend money in this hell-hole, any time of year? Why do I continue to spend money in this hell hole?

It's beginning to look a lot like Christmas, indeed.