Posted 2/09/2009 05:01:00 PM by Douglas

Turn out The Catholic Church™ is now accepting indulgences again. Good for them.

In recent months, dioceses around the world have been offering Catholics a spiritual benefit that fell out of favor decades ago — the indulgence, a sort of amnesty from punishment in the afterlife — and reminding them of the church’s clout in mitigating the wages of sin.

Well, whatever works. But what is an indulgence?

According to church teaching, even after sinners are absolved in the confessional and say their Our Fathers or Hail Marys as penance, they still face punishment after death, in Purgatory before they can enter heaven. In exchange for certain prayers, devotions or pilgrimages in special years, a Catholic can receive an indulgence, which reduces or erases that punishment instantly, with no formal ceremony or sacrament.

There are partial indulgences, which reduce purgatorial time by a certain number of days or years, and plenary indulgences, which eliminate all of it, until another sin is committed. You can get one for yourself, or for someone dead. You cannot buy one — the church outlawed the sale of indulgences in 1567 — but charitable contributions, combined with other acts, can help you earn one. There is a limit of one plenary indulgence per sinner per day.

So they don't sell them anymore, but you can get one for a "charitable" contribution? I'm guessing you don't get one for a contribution to Emily's List or the NOW. But why the ruse between selling and contribution? Just set up a website, lets say www.eDulgence.god, where you can enter your credit card number and get right with The Church™. I'm sure they forward your info right on up to the big guy upstairs.